Sarah Kate’s Coming Out Story | Coming Out Non Binary

Coming out wasn’t just a one-time experience for me, as it is with many people in the queer community.

Coming out is something I feel I do over and over and over again in many different ways. But there are notable coming out moments that I will always remember.

First, coming out as ‘gay’ to my mom in high school. I specifically remember coming home from school and being so nervous to tell her but somehow worked up the courage to do it. I handed her a scrapbook that my current girlfriend had made me for our “one month anniversary” and just sat while she looked through it.

She turned to me and said, “Are you saying you’re gay?” And I just nodded my head and burst into tears out of a rush of adrenaline, anxiety, and relief all at the same time. She embraced me immediately and said, “I love you, Sarah Kate, let’s order some pizza.” and that’s what we did. We ate pizza and watched tv together and it was a totally normal night and a wildly celebratory night all wrapped in one.

Then, in my early 20s, I came out again. This time as non-binary. I shaved my head and my mom told me to rock on. I decided to get top surgery. My partner supported me.

I shared my journey of being a feminine non-binary human. My online community embraced me. As time went on, coming out in little ways each and every day because easier and more natural to me. However, it never became less momentous. Every day that I come out in new ways still feels like a celebration of pizza and tv with a mom who loves and embraces me. Everyone deserves to feel that way.